Facing the present isn’t about taking a decision and off you go. However, a decision is required to embark on the journey. In order to experience the power of now, the decision requires a brave heart. But why does it require us to be brave? Let’s first have a look at what being present is about:
No judgements
No expectations: Expect the unexpected and be Ok with it
No tension and no resistance
Acceptance of everything (We don’t have to agree to accept)
Beginner’s mind: Emptying our head of everything we learned and think we know
Stop doing: There’s nothing to achieve
Start being: Experience everything with all our senses the way it is and indulge in the flow of come and go
To me, this sounded fairly easy. At least I thought I understood. What I understood, however, was the logical comprehension of the requirements only. And since real understanding only comes through the experience itself, I was lacking the knowledge of the consequences.
So why do we need to be brave-hearted choosing a life in the now?
In order to embody the above-mentioned requirements, we need to overcome our psychological-self, our ego. And if we haven’t realized it yet, it has to come first. Now our psychological-self is all we know, it’s all we think we are. Living now from this perspective, requires one to give-up its identity. Everything one believes he / she is.
The good news is, you won’t give up your identity in real. We release only the illusion we clung to through belief of who we never truly were. Nevertheless, the illusion seems to be the only truth, which requires courage to break away from. I was struggling to accept this at the beginning, like we all do. Normal, since no one knows it better at that stage. The “I” is all we know, hence, that’s us.
Thanks to lots of therapies, I learned about my psychological-self. My self-esteem was negatively impacted by beliefs I developed as a result of my grandparents favoring my older brother. Just to say that a mere suggestion such as "Follow your brother's example." can suffice to diminish one's self-worth for a lifetime. Or a simple comment such as “You could have done better” when presenting academic results would not contribute to its improvement. I bet these are common examples that most of us experienced as a child in one or another way.
No, it doesn’t need a severe trauma. Each of these constitutes already a traumatic experience in itself. This is not to blame our parents and grand-parents. We all live and manage our lives with the best of our knowledge at that specified moment. Looking back, we’re always wiser.
I realized that the unconscious lessons we learn from our experiences are deeply ingrained in our psyche, to which we hold a profound belief. A conviction that this dictates our identity. A further thought about the concept of “belief,” it became evident to me that our bodies are continuously responding to them and that this shapes our well-being / feeling. (Referring to the Circle of Thoughts and Emotions)
Someday, a thought came to my mind that if my current identity is formed from my experiences, then who was I before I had any experiences? Who was I at the day of my birth?
Although I didn’t know the answer. That’s where my mind opened and allowed other options to exist. Eventually I gained hope again while realizing that anxiety, depression and stress are caused by my psychological-self and will disappear as I reconnect with who I truly am.
Yet this is only the first step, and with it, the journey can begin.
I call it a journey in which you become a researcher, an observer of your own inner cosmos. The beauty in it is that you don’t need to rely anymore on external information. While you still can inspire yourself in others, you don’t need to ask yourself whether the answers you’re getting from someone are trustworthy or not. As you become more aware of yourself, the answers will come naturally from within you.
Going that way, paying attention to how your mind affects your experiences will gradually loosen your attachment to hidden beliefs. As you gain in consciousness about it, you will soon notice the shift in the responses of your body. Events that kept you dragging for ever suddenly dissolve after a shorter time. Instead, inner freedom takes place.
My free eBook: Living Now - 4 steps to relieve stress, depression and anxiety, is all about preparing the path. Realizing how our psychological-self is kept alive through our thoughts, our mind.
Yes, it requires courage to dare the first step, setting the sails. But the experience is priceless and enriches your life in a way that no money can ever buy.
Enjoy the moment
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